Your client is mad at you because he wouldn't take your advice on buying trip insurance, and now he's lost his vacation investment due to an unforeseen problem. You're to blame for not forcing him to buy it. Just wave your magic wand, and presto! You've turned back the clock, and the client is agreeing with you that buying trip insurance is a smart move.
You squelched some nagging doubts about hiring this new employee on the advice of well-meaning friends, and now you realize she's a trainwreck costing you money and clients. Wave your magic wand, and you're listening to your gut instead of your friends.
You accepted a new job without thoroughly vetting the employer or studying the organizational chart. Now you're smack in the middle of a political power play between two superiors with competing agendas who each claim to be your boss. Where's that magic wand?
You booked your best, most valued client into an unfamiliar resort enthusiastically endorsed by a supplier only to end up with a damaged relationship when things went awry. Magic wand to the rescue.
We've all had those experiences where you wish you could turn back the clock, and suddenly everything is right with the world and your life.
Sorry, but no magic wand exists except in your daydreams. So, after you've finished with your pity party and fantasies, what do you do? Pick up the pieces, learn a lesson and move on.
Here are some ideas that have helped me to minimize those disasters:
1. Don't indulge in "if only." If only I had been more forceful in selling him the trip insurance; if only I had ignored my friends' advice; if only I had been more thorough in checking out this employer. "If only" is not productive and keeps you mired in the past when you are clearly planted in the present.
2. Focus on the present. What can you do about your situation today to make it better? Apologize to your valued, unhappy client or give him a gift? Discipline that employee and give her written notice of expectations and deadlines? Remind your headstrong client that nobody expects the unexpected and to accept your advice on travel insurance, while you try to mitigate his losses? Be creative with the tools in your arsenal to put today's problem behind you.
3. Find the lesson you need to learn. Without learning from this problem, you'll probably make the same mistakes. Should you be more trusting and confident in your gut instincts? Should you require stubborn clients sign a statement that they're acting against your recommendations? Should you be more thoughtful and deliberate in your decision in who to work with? Take however long you need to thoughtfully pinpoint the juncture of actions that led to this problem.
4. Leave yourself reminders. Whatever your particular lesson, put up reminder signs about this incident and its outcome wherever you're most likely to see them — on your desk, on the wall, on the refrigerator, on your screen saver. So when a similar situation presents itself — and it likely will — you will have a visual reminder of a past mistake to give you the courage and confidence to act differently this time around. Then, you won't need a magic wand.