For any number of reasons, it’s time to move on. How should you do that? If you’ve had problems at work that led to your decision — a toxic boss or the promised terms of your employment weren’t delivered — you may be tempted to make a dramatic exit (don’t, of course).

If you’re leaving because you have a wonderful new job opportunity and everyone, including your current boss, thinks you ought to take it, making your exit becomes easier. But there are still right and wrong ways of doing it.

All the wrong ways involve burning your bridges behind you. All the right ways make it more likely your soon-to-be-ex-boss will give you a good job recommendation. Here’s a short list of the essentials to accomplish that:

Adequate Notice

Your employment contract may call for a specific minimum notice, but in many cases that won’t give your employer enough time to find and onboard your replacement. On the other hand, once you’ve notified your employer you’re leaving, you’re a lame duck, so you don’t want to drag your exit out.

Often, the best way to approach it is to give your employer the minimum required notice, but at the same time to give them some options — that to the extent you’re able, for example, you’ll stick around until they’ve hired your replacement. This shouldn’t be an open-ended offer, but merely a willingness to do what you can — this might mean another week or two or, if you’re high up in your company’s food chain, then as long as one or two months. Look at it as a negotiation that makes it a win for you both.

One last thing about giving notice: over the past few years it’s become increasingly common that once you do, you’ll be asked to leave the same day. Try not to take this personally (although it’s still pretty rude in my opinion, especially when the company practice is to have security guards accompany you to the door), but understand that it’s a policy your immediate supervisor rarely has any control over.

The Resignation Letter

Some companies require written notice of your intention to leave: the resignation letter. Even when it’s not required, it’s a good idea, but it shouldn’t be your primary means of communicating that you’re leaving and it should never be a substitute for giving notice in person.

Its contents can be pretty simple (do your best to keep it that way!):

• notification that you are resigning
• date you’re leaving (keep this to the nominal date — in person, you can express your willingness to stick around a little longer)
• shortest, most upbeat possible explanation of why you’re leaving
• an expression of gratitude for the job (do it even when you’re not — it’s a formality!)

Keep Emotion Out of It

Leaving your job is inherently emotional, whether you loved the job or hated it. It’s also emotional for your boss and co-workers. That’s why it’s important to do everything you can to keep emotion out of it.

This isn’t the time for heartfelt expression of feelings, especially if you’re glad to be going. You may be leaving because you’ve felt unappreciated or you think your boss is a bully, but the resignation letter should keep to something as neutral as possible that casts no blame on others. “A new job opportunity,” is a convenient catch-all expression that fulfills the minimum.

Remember that at some later date it’s a near-certainty that HR is going to get an evaluation request from a prospective employer. Increasingly, HR departments keep to the barest essentials in writing — when you started, your job title and when you left.

But over the phone is another matter: if your resignation latter is negative in tone, someone in HR that hasn’t the slightest idea who you really are can still say something like “Well, we don’t valuate performance, but there seem to have been some problems.” It’s verbal, leaves no trace and will surely sink your ship.

Don’t Share

Don’t get into how wonderful your new job is with your co-workers — what can that possibly accomplish that’s good? — and be sure to notify your boss you’re leaving before telling anyone else.

Once you’ve notified your boss, there’s nothing wrong with sending each of your co-workers a short note expresses something positive: how they’ve been helpful (mentors especially), and that you’ll miss working with them (probably should say that even if you won’t — you’re not trying to make enemies on your way out the door). If you want to add something more — about keeping in touch, for instance — that’s fine, but don’t ramble on. One short paragraph is ideal.

Make Your Last Days Your Best

You may be tempted to slack off a little once you know you’re out of there, but last impressions are just as important as first. How you conduct yourself in your final weeks is how your co-workers and your boss will remember you. You want them to remember what a great worker you were. Work hard to the very end.