A common theme in the round-table meetings and one-on-ones I host for my clients is frustration. Frustration with others not moving at the pace we need them to move. Frustration at salaries not matching our workload or experience. Frustration with constant change that leaves goals unclear or impossible to accomplish.

One of the goals of these meetings is for me to get a better picture of the work environment, but another is to stir the pot a little and see how receptive the team is to thinking differently. After all, if I am there, a significant change has usually happened or is about to. My client needs to know what staff can handle some more change versus who has become too tired, jaded or frustrated to rethink their usual approach.

Here are three common challenges I throw out during the conversation to probe willingness to think different, among other things:

1. Project and time management

"Other departments do not share the same sense of urgency that we do." While that sounds like a positive characteristic of the department doing the complaining, it is often a mask for a lack of accountability on their own part.

If the team's first response is to point the finger at others, I ask them two things. First, why is it that they are so great at what they do that no one can keep up with them? And conversely, what is everyone else's problem that they cannot keep up? Second, I want to know what the team has done to help all of the slower, noncompliant employees meet their department's demands.

If the team can come to a point where they can articulate what makes them strong; a true understanding of the challenges of other teams; and ways they can help, then that team is ready for anything. But if they are stuck playing the blame game, they are going to have a hard time remaining nimble and ready for anything.

2. Salary

Regardless of experience or industry, the most common complaints revolve around money. And the easiest way to challenge this thinking is with a frank conversation regarding expectations. This conversation normally has the following three focus areas: Did you negotiate well, or has this been a problem since you started here? Are your salary expectations realistic with the industry and position? Is the salary change you are expecting realistic to expect at your company?

Most people negotiate horribly when they start and then expect to make it up after they get their foot in the door. Please note that rarely happens, so either look for another job and plan to negotiate better next time or start working at a level that makes you feel like you are getting paid appropriately.

Second, please take a bite of a reality sandwich and then decide whether you are really worth a salary in the top percentile and make sure those reasons are accurate and based on fact, not your opinion of yourself.

Finally, even if you negotiated great but some significant change happened that legitimately warranted you getting a raise to the 99th percentile, run it through your company filter. How realistic is it that your company will now just give you another $20K? Be realistic about what you want and deserve, but also understand that your current employer might not be where you get it.

3. Constant change

Many people just complain about change, particularly that their boss or their company (or both) are constantly rearranging priorities. To them I ask: How often will you let yourself be frustrated by the same thing? If you know the target is always moving, then why don't you plan for it?

These conversations usually end in one of two ways: the person makes the change and actually reduces their stress level by starting to account for the inevitable modifications. Or they realize they are not a person who enjoys this type of environment, and they begin looking elsewhere for a workplace more suitable to their temperament.

In all cases, the key is to push yourself to think differently, to ask different questions and to truly explore why you are happy or unhappy where you are and, critically, what level of change you are willing to embrace to be happy at work.